DEVICE, ELECTROCONVULSIVE THERAPY

Description of Event or Problem

IN 1998 I FOLLOWED DR. (DOCTOR) INSTRUCTIONS TO STOP TAKING ZOLOFT OVER TWO WEEKS, CUTTING MY DOSE EACH TIME IN HALF. I FELT ALL RIGHT AT FIRST, BUT THEN STARTED EXPERIENCING SYMPTOMS, I HAD NEVER HAD BEFORE: EXTREME ANXIETY, OCD AND INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS, DIFFICULTY SLEEPING, CONCENTRATING, WORKING, CONVERSING. THIS WAS FOLLOWED BY PROFOUND DEPRESSION, MUCH WORSE THAN ANYTHING I HAD EXPERIENCED BEFORE BEING PUT ON THE MEDICATION. INSTEAD OF BEING RECOGNIZED AS WITHDRAWAL, I WAS MISDIAGNOSED AS A RECURRENCE OR WORSENING OF MY "ORIGINAL" CONDITION. I WAS PUT BACK ON ZOLOFT AND IT DID NOTHING FOR ME. I HAD SUICIDAL IDEATION, BUT I WAS SO DEPRESSED THAT I HAD NO ACTIVE PLAN, I ONLY WANTED TO BE HIT BY A TRUCK. I COULD NOT GO OUT IN PUBLIC FOR AT LEAST SIX MONTHS. MY DOCTORS AT THIS TIME WERE DR. (B)(6) OF (B)(6). I SAW MANY DIFFERENT PSYCHIATRISTS OVER THE YEARS, INCLUDING DR. (B)(6). UNFORTUNATELY, MY MEMORY HAS BEEN SO DAMAGED BY ALL OF THESE YEARS ON THE MEDICATION MERY GO ROUND, PLUS ECT, THAT I CAN'T REMEMBER THE NAMES OF MANY OF MY DOCTORS. I LOST MY CAREER IN CLIMATE CHANGE POLICY. IN THE NEXT YEARS, I WAS PRESCRIBED OTHER SSRIS AND SNRIS - CELEXA, LEXAPRO, PROZAC, VENLAFAXINE - BUT I CONTINUED TO HAVE DEBILITATING DEPRESSION, ANXIETY, DECLINE IN COGNITIVE CAPACITY, MAJOR SOCIAL DIFFICULTIES, VERY UNSTABLE RELATIONSHIPS: NONE OF WHICH I HAD BEFORE OR DURING TAKING ZOLOFT. I WAS HOSPITALIZED THREE TIMES DUE TO SUICIDAL IDEATION AND INTENT. EACH TIME THE DOCTORS WOULD SWITCH MY MEDICATIONS, OR DRASTICALLY RAISE OR LOWER DOSAGES, AND IN RETROSPECT, I HAVE TO ASSUME THAT THIS ALSO PUT ME INTO WITHDRAWAL THAT WAS NOT RECOGNIZED. I WAS GIVEN ELECTROSHOCK THERAPY BECAUSE NOTHING WAS MAKING ME BETTER. THE ELECTROSHOCK WENT WRONG, AND I BECAME CATATONIC AND HAD TO BE HOSPITALIZED AGAIN. THE ELECTROSHOCK FURTHER DAMAGED, MY MEMORY AND COGNITIVE CAPACITY. AS MY DOCTORS WERE CONTINUALLY SWITCHING MY MEDICATIONS OVER THE NEXT 15 YEARS, MY SYSTEM WAS CONSTANTLY BEING PROVOKED INTO WITHDRAWAL. I WAS GIVEN THE MESSAGE THAT I WAS ALWAYS DESTINED TO BE SEVERELY MENTALLY ILL, WHICH DID EXTREMELY GRAVE DAMAGE TO MY SENSE OF SELF. IT WAS NOT UNTIL 2021 THAT THERE WAS ENOUGH LITERATURE, AND DOCUMENT DOCUMENTATION, FOR ME TO LEARN THAT WHAT HAD HAPPENED TO ME WAS PROTRACTED WITHDRAWAL. WITHDRAWAL THAT RUINED MY LIFE, KEPT ME FROM HAVING CHILDREN, KEPT ME FROM GETTING MARRIED, TOOK MY CAREER. NOW THIS MANY YEARS LATER, I AM SUFFERING, LONG-TERM ADVERSE CONSEQUENCES FROM BEING ON ALL OF THESE MEDICATIONS, AND I AM BEING FORCED TO TAPER THEM. AT LEAST NOW THERE IS SOME BETTER INFORMATION, IF YOU KNOW WHERE TO FIND IT. THERE ARE VERY FEW PROVIDERS WHO KNOW ABOUT HYPERBOLIC TAPERING, OR ANY OF THE KNOWLEDGE THAT HAS BEEN ACCUMULATED BY FELLOW PATIENTS AND A FEW RESEARCH RESEARCHERS. I HAD NEUROCOGNITIVE TESTING DONE WHILE LIVING IN (B)(6) IN 2019. THEY TOLD ME THAT MOST OF THE PEOPLE WHO THEY SEE IN MY AGE GROUP (I WAS BORN IN 1971) WHO HAVE THIS LEVEL OF COGNITIVE DECLINE, ARE PEOPLE WHO'VE BEEN TAKING MULTIPLE PSYCHOTROPIC MEDICATIONS FOR MANY YEARS. THEY ALSO SAID THAT THERE ARE NOT REALLY ANY GOOD STUDIES ON ANY OF THIS, SO ALL THEY COULD REALLY OFFER ME WAS THEIR ANECDOTAL EXPERIENCE. I HAVE BEEN SERIOUSLY DISABLED BY THE WITHDRAWAL THAT I SUFFERED FROM ZOLOFT AND SUBSEQUENT MEDICATIONS. I GRADUATED FROM (B)(6). I WORKED IN THE (B)(6) ON INTERNATIONAL CLIMATE CHANGE POLICY. I WORKED AS A CONSULTANT FOR THE (B)(6) ON CLIMATE CHANGE. FOR YEARS AFTER THAT, I COULD NOT WORK AT ALL. THEN I WAS A PART-TIME DANCE TEACHER. NOW I AM AN ARTIST BECAUSE THAT IS ONE OF THE ONLY THINGS THAT I AM CAPABLE OF DOING. THIS MEANS THAT THIS WITHDRAWAL SERIOUSLY DAMAGED MY ABILITY TO EARN A LIVING. THE FDA NEEDS TO PROVIDE BETTER LABELING ON THESE MEDICATIONS.